I simply do not understand what happened over the long weekend.  Where exactly was it written that I should be heartbroken more than once over the course of the three days?  What did I do to distress the all-powerful media gods?  Let's take a look at specifics, shall we?

First up, Salma Hayek, star of The Salma Hayek Show (the show formerly known as 30 Rock) and my dreams got married… and not to me.  That's right, she didn't marry me.  She didn't even ask my permission to marry someone else.  She didn't call me to inform me she was marrying anyone.  She didn't even send me an invitation to reception.  What's up with that?

Oh sure, you say that I wouldn't have flown to Paris on short notice to attend the wedding.  You don't know that, I might have gone.  Airfares are really inexpensive right now.  Plus, it's not like she and her new husband don't have the money to pay for a ticket for me, is it? 

Fine, let's set that aside for a moment, I understand that Salma Hayek ever saying anything to me is a long shot.  So, that news by itself wouldn't have destroyed my weekend.  Oh no, it took more than one event to do that.

With that in mind, I submit to you that last night I was hurt by Top Gear, a show that I have referred to as the best on television.  Top Gear was back in the United States, and not just the United States, but San Francisco, my backyard.  They couldn't have popped by for a nice cup of tea?  They couldn't have rung me up on the phone and asked me to meet them for fish and chips or bangers and mash?  What's up with that?  Quite honestly, even a single, local, not long distance, phone call to say “good show, chap” would have been more than acceptable. 

It is true, good things happened over the course of the three days, we got one of the best season-premiere episodes of The Amazing Race in quite a long time.  Watching those folks get cheese down a hill and jump from the GoldenEye dam was hugely entertaining.  However, the bad still outnumbered the good.  People just don't seem to be watching the shows I would have them watch, of course, on Monday I would have them watch almost everything, but that's neither here nor there.  What I'm talking about specifically here is ChuckChuck is a fun show and unlike anything else on television, but last night it came in fourth in its time period.  Fourth.  Okay, it's true that I generally watch three different shows in the 8pm hour, but CBS was airing comedy repeats and I've never understood the appeal of The Bachelor.  So, in my mind, it should have been second behind House, not fourth. 

I don't want to see Chuck disappear at the end of this season, I really don't, but with NBC losing five hours of real primetime for Jay Leno next fall, I think few shows on the network are safe, and something that comes in fourth in its time period, with one of the networks in front of it airing repeats, it's hard to call Chuck “safe.”  Maybe tonight will bring better TV news, Leverage is starting the first part of its two-part finale tonight, and that's a show I like and it's been renewed for a second season.  Probably though that means something horrific will happen to it and we'll never see it again.